If You Were Gay
by Kousagi Angel
Summary: Miyagi suspects that the new assistant professor is gay and decides to ask him about it. Songfic.


If You Were Gay

Disclaimer: I do not own Junjou Romantica or Avenue Q; I am just a fan.

Summary: Miyagi suspects that the new assistant professor is gay and decides to ask him about it.

I absolutely love this song. It's so funny along with the rest of the Avenue Q songs. Anyway this was originally intended to be a conversation between Misaki and Takahiro, but then, after writing it, I realized something wasn't quite right. But, then I thought that this was definitely something Miyagi would do to Hiroki, and thus this songfic was born.

This has been sitting in my computer for a few months now and I just now gained the courage to post it. So, err, tell me what you think. Anyways, enjoy!

--

"Ahhh…. An afternoon alone with my favorite book; no pesky students and definitely no Miyagi. How could it get any better than this?" Hiroki asked himself, opening the book in his hands.

"Oh, hey, Kamijou!" Miyagi greeted as he walked into the office.

"Hi Miyagi." Hiroki groaned.

"You'll never believe what happened to me on the subway today! There was this guy and he was smiling at me, and talking to me." Miyagi explained.

"That is very interesting."

"He was being real friendly. And, I think he was coming on to me. I think he might've thought that I was gay."

"So, uh, why are you telling me this, hm?" Hiroki huffed. "Why should I care? I don't care. What did you have lunch today?" He asked trying in vain to change the subject.

"Oh, you don't have to get all defensive about it, Kamijou." Miyagi teased, poking the brunette.

"I'M NOT GETTING DEFENSIVE!" Hiroki yelled angrily. "What do I care about some gay guy you met, okay? I am trying to read." He said gruffly, turning away from the annoying man.

"Oh, I didn't mean anything by it, Kamijou. I just think it's something we should be able to talk about." Miyagi said.

"I don't want to talk about it, Kyoju! This conversation is over!"

"Yea, but…"

"OVER!"

"Well, okay, but just so you know. If you were gay, that'd be okay. I mean 'cause hey, ha, I like you anyway. Because you see, if it were me, I would feel free to say that I was gay. But I'm. Not. Gay." Miyagi sang.

"Kyoju, please! I am trying to read!" Hiroki snapped. Feeling Miyagi's eyes boring holes in the back of his head he yelled, "WHAT?!"

"If you were queer," Miyagi started.

"Ah, Kyoju!"

"I'd still be here," Miyagi said.

"Kyoju, I'm trying to read this book." Hiroki repeated.

"Year after year," Miyagi continued.

"Miyagi!"

"Because you're dear to me." Miyagi said as he hugged the angry brunette from behind.

"Arg!" Hiroki pushed the man off of him and moved to the other side of the office.

"And I know that you," Miyagi started.

"What?" Hiroki asked angrily.

"Would accept me too~!" Miyagi sang.

"I would?"

"If I told you today "Hey! Guess what, I'm gay!" But, I'm. Not. Gay." Miyagi said, dancing back over to him. "I'm happy just being with you! So what should it matter to me what you do in bed with guys?"

"Miyagi that is wrong!"

"No it's not! If you were gay, I'd shout hurray!"

"I am not listening!"

"And here I'd stay,"

"Lalalalala!" Hiroki covered his ears, trying to tune Miyagi out.

"But I wouldn't get in your way."

"Ahhh!"

"You can count on me to always be beside you everyday, to tell you its okay, you were just born that way and as they say it's in your DNA, you're gay!"

"I AM NOT GAY!"

"If you were gay."

"Arg!"

Omake:

Hiroki smirked as he looked upon the two in the office he shared with Miyagi. The dean's son was lying on top of Miyagi and was glaring daggers at him; while Miyagi just looked like a deer caught in headlights. "Uh-uh I can explain, Kamijou." Miyagi said nervously. Huffing angrily, the little brat climbed off of him, grabbed his bag and left the room. "Ah, Shinobu-chin!" Miyagi called as he quickly got up and rushed to the door. By the time he got there though, Shinobu was already halfway down the hall. "Dammit," he cursed.

"If you were gay—"

"SHUT-UP!"

--

Eh, it's not that much, in fact most of it is just the lyrics rewritten into the dialogue with a few different words in between. If I had Junjou Romantica clips and actually knew how to work Windows Movie Maker without it freezing up on me, I would have just made it into a video, but unfortunately I don't have anything like that; plus my computer hates me and would probably make the video crap anyway.


End file.
